Wednesday, April 4, 2018

There Are No Cameras Here


Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of Me Talking. I suppose I should start by explaining my absence for the past couple of months. As many of you know by now, I am attending university, and have found myself quite busy with work both inside and outside of my classes. I know this is no excuse, but I am simply explaining my lack of posting. The good news, for me at least, is that I am only a month away from the end of the semester. I mean that literally! May 4th is the last day of the semester, and I will have completed my freshman year. Even thinking about it makes me feel good you know? I know the majority of my problems won’t vanish as quickly as this second semester will, but I’d like to think the few things that distract me from my worries will be the only things I can occupy my time with. I was speaking to one of my peers the other night. We were relaxing after what felt like an eternity of a study break. As we were taking a break, silently taking the time to just be silent and not think about the mountains of material we just spent hours covering, my peer broke the silence between us.
“College is truly the best time, and the worst time.” They said.

“What do you mean?” I questioned.

“I mean, look at us. Here we are, two people who haven’t the slightest clue what’s going to happen tomorrow or the next day, or in the next 20 years, willfully paying thousands of dollars a year just to stress out, and tear our social lives and mental health apart.”

“Well you shouldn’t think that way. Think of it as preparation for the real world.”

My peer did not say anything.


“Like, I embrace the stress school gives me. I don’t like getting up early after staying up the majority of night, only to repeat the same process the next day, but I know that sometimes, that’s what life is about, I guess.”

Now both of us were silent. After about a minute or so, the conversation continued.

“When I’m at work, I think about doing my job for the rest of my life, and I just can’t see myself doing that. I think that’s why I work. It serves as a reminder for the alternative reality I can live if I fuck up in college. It’s almost like I’m in an alternate dimension all together.” I said.

“That’s what scares me a lot of the time. It’s like there is no way out of this. You either work like shit for the rest of your life, constantly worrying about bills because you chose to get a shitty job, or, you come here for four years, tear your hair out, become a communist, and still not have any type of security for the future.”

Upon saying this, my fellow peer took put their phone and began to tap around, checking their social media.

“They can’t take away the knowledge you acquired.” I said.

“I guess not, but it seems like this world cares more about the paper in your wallet, or the paper you acquired at the end of all this, rather than the ‘knowledge’ you speak of.”

“That’s true, but I think I’d rather be unsuccessful with a high level of intelligence rather than some bum with a diploma or a rich man with no education.” I said.

They put their phone away.

“I don’t know Rodolfo, from what I’ve seen, this world gets the best of us instead of us getting the best of the world.” They said.

I looked at my watch. It was a quarter past nine.

“I have to go.”

“Alright, sounds good.” They said.

“I’ll see you around.” I said.

“It’s a small school I’m sure you will.”

We said goodbye. I packed up my books. As I was walking to my car, I could not help but look up at the stars. Somewhere in the deep confines of space, there has to be some race of intelligent life. I wonder if they have the same problems out there, as we do in here. I drove home that night, ate a late supper, and studied some more.



Thursday, February 15, 2018

No One Cares

The Worst Guy
By: Rodolfo Perez

I don’t care.
As a matter of fact, I couldn’t stand to care more.
For what do I have to gain?
Other than plain, vain attempts to find an infinity
In a finite reality.
To find perfection in the imperfect.
To find peace in a war zone,
Destroyed by Love
And misunderstanding.
All this is done just to be understood.
For the fight for peace will continue,
Perfection will be found.
It has to be found
Right?
Above all the complex tactics,
And uncomfortable complications,
Infinity will be found.
I have everything to benefit from giving a shit.
I still care.


P.E.N.T.C.I.

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

That 2017 Song Stuck in My Head



That one stuck song, one of abstract notes with melodic undertones. The whisper of certain gravity heard when the silence played within the echoes of its day. They arose. Every day with the sense of a lullaby, walking into a new world that felt secure and alive with rhythm. As days passed, the circles of notes slowed eased its mark under their eyes. The song replayed again and again, slowly turning into a tormented music box that would not fall quiet. 

Its humans strained, listening to the meaning of its whisper. The quickness of the day and the noise of the world made the effort almost impossible. The songs of others became louder and louder, until their own song got drowned within the boom. The notes became jumbled and the boom of the bass soon kept them up. The drum of their hearts became softer and the rhythm of the breath became weaker.

The songs stuck in their heads were silenced. The song of life became jumbled. There was too much too listen to and yet there was nothing at all. Confusion was the new director of its master work. Truth was its ailing assistance, slowly trying to build strength. Rearrangement of cognition and emotions were the innovators of change, slowly stepping into place. Slowly allowing new music to come along. The listeners learned, understanding the old song of confusion were truly tangled trails of clarity. With that once said, the song stuck in their heads began taking new rhythm.
The music continued. 

Saturday, December 23, 2017

Stars


Another night passes, as does another soul.
Too many seconds that could have been,
But will never be.
The existence of optimism, and faith,
Are met by their match that is the eternity.
And I wonder,
What lies beyond the soil, and the air?
The promise of bliss, and tranquility?
Or the abyss?
I do not know,
We do not know,

Only the stars do.

Thursday, December 21, 2017

DEAD WORKMEN DON'T RETIRE

Dead Workmen Don’t Retire
By: Rodolfo Perez

We are the first of the last,
The forlorn workmen of a shunned generation.
We are the reason there is hate,
And the reason there is the love to hate.
We are the depressed,
The unfaithful,
The false witnesses,
And the stubborn.
Our skies are the Final frontier,
And we are The Cowboys.
But what are we to do, beyond wonder?
Are we to tame this seemingly untamable jungle of chaos?
Or are we to be simple slaves to the chaos, eventually adopting its ways?
We don’t know,
And We don’t wish to think of this for now.



P.E.N.T.C.I.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Take Me to the Seas



When I was invited to write for this blog, I did it because of my desire to connect with others. I felt like my life has been tied down by surface judgements which never really made a break to the depth of one’s true self. Drawn by the complexity of others, I hope to openly share that we all are complex humans. You might be reading this because you are drawn to me, almost like a moth in the darkness to a light……or maybe I annoyed you enough to be my friend.

Oddly, enough I share this as you sit online. You might be bored and grew tired of shared photos of nothing, yet you stopped to read this. If you talk to me in real life, I will smile and brush off what will be said here, so listen up.

Being introverted, makes socializing and talking hard. Social niceties and small talk are a drudgery. Balancing the right facial expressions and pitch tones of “hello” and “how are you” tire me down to the soul. In a world full of “I’m good”, I want to know what kept you up all night.

When I ask people about who they are, most people become suspicious. My curiosity either pushes or it pulls. Conversations go astray as I find out the truth. Without any words, they understand they can’t be just “good”. I think the best conversations I have ever had have been unsaid. Unaccustomed with a raw honesty and truth, I gently push. I love the world and understand I do not understand a lot, but I push for the truth.

The point of this entry is that there is realness in everything. Even if people say they are “good” or smile and laugh, there is always so much more. Hopefully, if you are still reading, I hope you’ll want to go to sea, even if there isn’t a guaranteed safe boat. We will never completely know each other but we have the option of listening to each other stories. Stay strong.

Signing off,

Giselle

Saturday, November 18, 2017

An Introduction: Giselle Magana


Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of "Me Talking". 

This will be my first post for "Me Talking! I am super excited in sharing the wisdom I have acquired during my twenty years of life. My name is Giselle Magana and am currently an undergraduate student double majoring in Business Administration with a concentration in Management and Apparel Merchandising!

I hope to cover the struggles of college through the perspective of an introverted person and supply tips and tricks in how to survive its wild ride! I will not be giving you guides on what to wear or how to look, I will simply give thoughts on life that will hopefully comfort you in your own questions and concerns. Expect reflection bits and poetic anecdotes of moments written for mild enjoyment.

Altogether, my vision is to inspire and generate content that will be worthwhile. Let us seek for greater truth in sharing our own. I will leave down below quick little facts about me so that we can be become more acquainted with each other!

Quick Facts of Giselle Magana by Giselle Magana:

1.         I love writing, but not enough to make a career out of it.

2.         If I have any free time, I am usually doing something weird like analyzing a mythological story!

3.         My favorite color is lavender, it’s a pale purple and it’s great. 

4.         I love social justice and community outreach initiatives such as Fair Trade.

5.         I am HUGE environmentalist. Hand in hand, I am very down to earth person.

6.         Ask me why I am a fashion major and I will explain to you the concept of Fast Fashion and materialism. *PLEASE don’t ask me for fashion advice or the latest trends because I’m not about that. 

7.         In the future, I hope to work in developing businesses focused on creating ethical jobs to those most disadvantaged, such as third world workers that do not have access to decent working conditions, education or treated humanely. 

8.         I am dreamy realist, which means I love making and strategizing plans but soon get lost in daydreams once the plan has been established.

9.         I have a dry sense of humor, and it’s lovely.

10.       I ran out of facts but here you are reading this.

That is all for now!

Signing off,

Giselle