Wednesday, April 4, 2018

There Are No Cameras Here (UPDATE #23)

Hello everyone and welcome to another edition of Me Talking. I suppose I should start by explaining my absence for the past couple of months. As many of you know by now, I am attending university, and have found myself quite busy with work both inside and outside of my classes. I know this is no excuse, but I am simply explaining my lack of posting. The good news, for me at least, is that I am only a month away from the end of the semester. I mean that literally! May 4th is the last day of the semester, and I will have completed my freshman year. Even thinking about it makes me feel good you know? I know the majority of my problems won’t vanish as quickly as this second semester will, but I’d like to think the few things that distract me from my worries will be the only things I can occupy my time with. I was speaking to one of my peers the other night. We were relaxing after what felt like an eternity of a study break. As we were taking a break, silently taking the time to just be silent and not think about the mountains of material we just spent hours covering, my peer broke the silence between us.
“College is truly the best time, and the worst time.” They said.

“What do you mean?” I questioned.

“I mean, look at us. Here we are, two people who haven’t the slightest clue what’s going to happen tomorrow or the next day, or in the next 20 years, willfully paying thousands of dollars a year just to stress out, and tear our social lives and mental health apart.”

“Well you shouldn’t think that way. Think of it as preparation for the real world.”

My peer did not say anything.

“Like, I embrace the stress school gives me. I don’t like getting up early after staying up the majority of night, only to repeat the same process the next day, but I know that sometimes, that’s what life is about, I guess.”

Now both of us were silent. After about a minute or so, the conversation continued.

“When I’m at work, I think about doing my job for the rest of my life, and I just can’t see myself doing that. I think that’s why I work. It serves as a reminder for the alternative reality I can live if I fuck up in college. It’s almost like I’m in an alternate dimension all together.” I said.

“That’s what scares me a lot of the time. It’s like there is no way out of this. You either work like shit for the rest of your life, constantly worrying about bills because you chose to get a shitty job, or, you come here for four years, tear your hair out, become a communist, and still not have any type of security for the future.”

Upon saying this, my fellow peer took put their phone and began to tap around, checking their social media.

“They can’t take away the knowledge you acquired.” I said.

“I guess not, but it seems like this world cares more about the paper in your wallet, or the paper you acquired at the end of all this, rather than the ‘knowledge’ you speak of.”

“That’s true, but I think I’d rather be unsuccessful with a high level of intelligence rather than some bum with a diploma or a rich man with no education.” I said.

They put their phone away.

“I don’t know Rodolfo, from what I’ve seen, this world gets the best of us instead of us getting the best of the world.” They said.

I looked at my watch. It was a quarter past nine.

“I have to go.”

“Alright, sounds good.” They said.

“I’ll see you around.” I said.

“It’s a small school I’m sure you will.”

We said goodbye. I packed up my books. As I was walking to my car, I could not help but look up at the stars. Somewhere in the deep confines of space, there has to be some race of intelligent life. I wonder if they have the same problems out there, as we do in here. I drove home that night, ate a late supper, and studied some more.

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